Keeping up with the conversations, decisions, and changes that come with starting and supporting a family is far more difficult than most can imagine. Whether you have a newborn at home or a family of six, balancing parenthood and your relationship with your partner is a trial for most couples. But conscious communication and a little guidance from a family-friendly relationship counselor go a long way toward striking a healthy balance.

Acknowledge the Value of Both Roles

Sometimes the simplest thing you can do to find mental ease and balance in regard to your split roles is acknowledging that there is value in being both a parent and a partner. It's okay to be excited about both your partner and your child. It's okay to say that you would rather spend time with one or the other. And it's okay to love one as full as you love the other, even if it is in a different way. Talk to your partner openly about the value you see in being their partner and that which you see in being the parent to your child.

Negotiate & Communicate

Remember that you are parenting as a team. You and your partner may have different parenting styles, and while it’s important for you to bring your unique approach to the table, it’s equally valuable to negotiate with your partner in matters of your child. Make parenting a team activity: communicate openly and respectful about problems you may be facing and work together to come to a solution, even if that means conceding sometimes. The "my way or the highway" approach doesn't serve most relationships, and it won't help in parenthood. Be willing to make sacrifices for your child as well as for your partner.

Make Time for Your Partner and Your Children

When it comes to balancing parenthood and partnership, it’s important to remember most individuals are also juggling a day job, not to mention house chores, errands, and self-care. Start by scheduling just 20 minutes out of your day to spend intentional, attentive time with your child, and another 20 with your partner. Build on these experiences until they become routine. Keep in mind that one-on-one time with your partner or child is equally important as family time. Make sure to account for both in your routine.

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